My kitty is a diva!

Let me tell you something abut exotic pets. They are much better when someone else owns them.
We got fooled with our cats. We thought we had some silver tabbies, no biggee. We thought our dog would get along with our tabbies.
The word wrong, does not describe the situation. Roscoe a full breed schnauser, all of five years old, bit Ralph when he was three months old. Cats never forget.
Exotic cats, up to six months, are just plain old nice kittens. They sleep in your lap, purr, play with dust balls and every living thing in the house. They go in the litter box like a watch. Right on time.
At six months, they kill the dog, the female is already in heat, the male hates everyone in his domain. At six months, we took the male to the vet to turn him into an house cat. At 10 months we had to find an home for the dog. We would go to the shop and come home to find blood all over the walls and the dog hiding in the closet, whimpering. His face hamburger. At 10 months, we took both the Kitties to the vet for shots. Ralph remembered the first vet. An alien in a white coat who stole body parts. We warned the vet that we thought the kitties were a little high strung. He assured us he could handle them. We told him we thought they were F1 Bengals, he told us they were silver tabbies.
Ralph and Muffy took out the vet, the assistant, and four trainees. When we went in to rescue the vet, Ralph buried his canine incisor teeth in my right hand, exiting through the palm. His bite radius is measured at 1.25" at 10 months old. I grabbed his head, he let go, I shook his head and said no. He was sorry. The vet took 15 stitches, the assistant, 21, the helpers were getting stitched up. Muffy was ready to take on all comers, Ralph was sorry he bit me. I told the vet, no anal probes! At 11 months, in Los Angeles, Ralph broke through a glass door and took out a dog in the yard. At 13 months, both Ralph and Muffy got us thrown out of an hotel 6 by attacking the room maid. It was the first leg of the journey back to Floriduh and we not only had to keep going to hotels, but we also had to find an house. For the next three months, four hurricanes later, we did not again leave the hotel room.
Bengals only bond to one human. You literally cannot find another home for them.
The home we now live in, the Bengals do not go outside. They guard the doors and windows and no one comes in. They hate little children, certain people they just go off on, and nothing living is in our house except them and us. They like the Serval, can jump 12ft straight up.
Ralph guards me and sits at my feet. He will jump on my lap, but, I have to hold him upside down by the middle. He likes that. Then he jumps off and sits at my feet. Muffy sits on my wife's lap as long as it is available, day and night. She clings like saran wrap. I come close and she growls and hisses. She hates me. We had to build two book shelves for them, on opposite sides of the room. Ralph has his, and Muffy has hers. They go up there and just stare at us.
We love them to death. As we are not people people anyway, it serves us just great. They are our children. When we go to the shop, Ralph and Muffy yell at us and yell at us when we come home. Then they sit with their backs to us. I had to completely tile the bathroom. Muffy will absolutely not go in the litter box. It is either the shower, or tile floor next to the litter box. Hey, easy to clean. All tile.
When we work on our jewelery, they sit and stare at us. All day. Muffy stares at the wife, Ralph stares at me. All day.
I had a friend years ago, who had a pet Bobcat. He had that cat toilet trained! I thought, if I had an exotic cat, I could get him to use the toilet and be at least passably friendly. Silly me.
We love them like children. Good thing we do not like people.
There are pictures of Ralph, Muffy, and Kitty, my old Serval somewhere on the forum. Kitty was 58lbs when I got divorced and he did not like her. Not at all. I miss Kitty. I guess it was a mess, what was she thinking?
Why do we get so attached to these four legged monsters?