Joke thread !

rickb still telling self it's just a hobby RickB Knapping Member since May 2010 Posts: 4,814	Joke thread ! Dec 30, 2021 7:54:23 GMT -5 hummingbirdstones, miket, and 2 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by rickb on Dec 30, 2021 7:54:23 GMT -5 "We're Rich, We Can Retire!" \| Sanford and Son Fred Goes To The Dentist \| Sanford and Son
	Last Edit: Dec 30, 2021 7:58:00 GMT -5 by rickb My car is not vegan, it drinks fossil fuel.

rockjunquie Global Moderator Member since March 2012 Posts: 30,189	Joke thread ! Dec 31, 2021 8:06:24 GMT -5 rickb, stephan, and 4 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by rockjunquie on Dec 31, 2021 8:06:24 GMT -5

rickb still telling self it's just a hobby RickB Knapping Member since May 2010 Posts: 4,814	Joke thread ! Jan 4, 2022 18:58:54 GMT -5 rockjunquie and Lumberlegs like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by rickb on Jan 4, 2022 18:58:54 GMT -5
	My car is not vegan, it drinks fossil fuel.

stephan still telling self it's just a hobby Member since March 2015 Posts: 4,559	Joke thread ! Jan 6, 2022 17:04:15 GMT -5 Pat, jasoninsd, and 1 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by stephan on Jan 6, 2022 17:04:15 GMT -5 There are 10 kinds of people -- those who understand binary, and those who don't.
	- Stephan -------------------------------------------------- "Conversation should be more like ping-pong, and less like archery.” — Alan Alda "The good thing about science is that it’s true whether or not you believe in it.” — Neil DeGrasse Tyson

Lumberlegs fully equipped rock polisher Not Dead Member since September 2021 Posts: 1,652	Joke thread ! Jan 11, 2022 12:45:51 GMT -5 catskillrocks, rickb, and 5 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Lumberlegs on Jan 11, 2022 12:45:51 GMT -5
	Adversity is the first path to truth - Byron Follow your bliss - Joseph Campbell Chad

realrockhound
Cave Dweller

Member since June 2020
Posts: 1,318

Joke thread ! Jan 16, 2022 2:08:08 GMT -5 via mobile jasoninsd likes this

Quote

Post by realrockhound on Jan 16, 2022 2:08:08 GMT -5

A woman was very distraught at the fact that she had not had a date or any sex in quite some time.

She was afraid she might have something wrong with her, so she decided to seek the medical expertise of a sex therapist. Her doctor recommended that she see Dr. Chang, the well-known Chinese sex therapist, so she went to see him.

Upon entering the examination room, Dr. Chang said, "OK, take off all you crose." The woman did as she was told. "Now, get down and craw reery, reery fass to odder side of room." Again, the woman did as she was instructed. Dr. Chang then said, "OK, now craw reery, reery fass back to me." So she did.

Dr. Chang shook his head slowly and said, "Your probrem vewy bad. You haf Ed Zachary Disease. Worse case I ever see. Dat why you not haf sex or dates."

Worried, the woman asked anxiously, "Oh my God, Dr. Chang, what is Ed Zachary Disease?"

Dr. Chang looked the woman in the eye and replied, "Ed Zachary Disease is when your face rook Ed Zachary rike your ass."

rickb still telling self it's just a hobby RickB Knapping Member since May 2010 Posts: 4,814	Joke thread ! Feb 19, 2022 19:56:06 GMT -5 rockjunquie, hummingbirdstones, and 1 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by rickb on Feb 19, 2022 19:56:06 GMT -5
	My car is not vegan, it drinks fossil fuel.

lunker Cave Dweller Member since April 2021 Posts: 381	Joke thread ! Mar 14, 2022 22:49:19 GMT -5 catskillrocks, mohs, and 8 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by lunker on Mar 14, 2022 22:49:19 GMT -5

rickb still telling self it's just a hobby RickB Knapping Member since May 2010 Posts: 4,814	Joke thread ! Mar 28, 2022 7:40:59 GMT -5 hummingbirdstones, Rockindad, and 1 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by rickb on Mar 28, 2022 7:40:59 GMT -5 Al Goes Bra Shopping! \| Married With Children
	My car is not vegan, it drinks fossil fuel.

amygdule gets rocks for Christmas Member since April 2012 Posts: 6,538	Joke thread ! Mar 29, 2022 7:11:49 GMT -5 Toad, rickb, and 5 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by amygdule on Mar 29, 2022 7:11:49 GMT -5 politicallyincorrecthumor.com/

parfive no longer being taken for granite Member since August 2005 Posts: 8,793	Joke thread ! Mar 29, 2022 11:12:42 GMT -5 rickb, rockjunquie, and 3 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by parfive on Mar 29, 2022 11:12:42 GMT -5
	Consider the Earth’s history as the old measure of the English yard, the distance from the King’s nose to the tip of his outstretched hand. One stroke of a nail file on his middle finger erases human history. John McPhee - Basin and Range

parfive no longer being taken for granite Member since August 2005 Posts: 8,793	Joke thread ! Mar 29, 2022 11:13:54 GMT -5 catskillrocks, mohs, and 9 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by parfive on Mar 29, 2022 11:13:54 GMT -5
	Last Edit: Mar 29, 2022 11:28:27 GMT -5 by parfive Consider the Earth’s history as the old measure of the English yard, the distance from the King’s nose to the tip of his outstretched hand. One stroke of a nail file on his middle finger erases human history. John McPhee - Basin and Range

mohs can identify rocks - even green ones hardtbutte Member since January 2009 Posts: 19,201	Joke thread ! Mar 29, 2022 12:34:16 GMT -5 rickb likes this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by mohs on Mar 29, 2022 12:34:16 GMT -5 rock hates to be boxed in so from under Hard don't forget to add Acid mostly
	dazagneiss

parfive no longer being taken for granite Member since August 2005 Posts: 8,793	Joke thread ! Mar 31, 2022 1:11:14 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by parfive on Mar 31, 2022 1:11:14 GMT -5 It’s not often 7:37 goes missing and Boeing and the NTSB get to sleep late.
	Consider the Earth’s history as the old measure of the English yard, the distance from the King’s nose to the tip of his outstretched hand. One stroke of a nail file on his middle finger erases human history. John McPhee - Basin and Range

amygdule gets rocks for Christmas Member since April 2012 Posts: 6,538	Joke thread ! May 8, 2022 15:13:48 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by amygdule on May 8, 2022 15:13:48 GMT -5

rockbrain Cave Dweller Member since January 2022 Posts: 1,153	Joke thread ! May 17, 2022 21:50:03 GMT -5 catskillrocks, mohs, and 6 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by rockbrain on May 17, 2022 21:50:03 GMT -5 A pirate walks in to a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of his pants. The bartender says, "doesn't that bother you?" The pirate replies, "Argh! it's driving me nuts!"

jasoninsd misunderstood rock expert Dreams About Rocks! Member since July 2020 Posts: 13,175	Joke thread ! Jul 28, 2022 19:57:58 GMT -5 rickb, rockpickerforever, and 7 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by jasoninsd on Jul 28, 2022 19:57:58 GMT -5 Today I spotted an albino Dalmatian. It was the least I could do for him.
	Favorite Quotes: "It always seems impossible until it is done." - Nelson Mandela "Life becomes easier when you learn to accept the apology you never got." - Robert Brault "You can't wait until life isn't hard anymore before you decide to be happy." - Nightbirde (RIP 2/19/22) My Etsy Shop: www.etsy.com/shop/MadBadgerLapidary

rockbrain Cave Dweller Member since January 2022 Posts: 1,153	Joke thread ! Jul 28, 2022 23:15:46 GMT -5 mohs, rockjunquie, and 3 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by rockbrain on Jul 28, 2022 23:15:46 GMT -5 Somebody tried to sell me a coffin today. That's the last thing I need!

parfive no longer being taken for granite Member since August 2005 Posts: 8,793	Joke thread ! Jul 29, 2022 0:00:05 GMT -5 Pat, rockjunquie, and 3 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by parfive on Jul 29, 2022 0:00:05 GMT -5 Just read a list of 100 Things To Do Before You Die. Kinda surprised that “Yell for help” wasn’t one of them.
	Consider the Earth’s history as the old measure of the English yard, the distance from the King’s nose to the tip of his outstretched hand. One stroke of a nail file on his middle finger erases human history. John McPhee - Basin and Range

mohs can identify rocks - even green ones hardtbutte Member since January 2009 Posts: 19,201	Joke thread ! Jul 29, 2022 23:09:00 GMT -5 rickb, rockjunquie, and 2 more like this Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by mohs on Jul 29, 2022 23:09:00 GMT -5 Doc recommended sand baths. I asked: will that help my conditions? No. Butte it will help ya get used to being underground... mostly
	Last Edit: Jul 29, 2022 23:09:27 GMT -5 by mohs dazagneiss